should be asleep

its 230 in the morning.

yeah, i cant sleep again. my body clock is operating oddly again.
spent the last 2 hrs tossing and turning in bed. i blame chinese new year for screwing up my schedule.

im sitting at my desk listening to smooth motown and the isley brothers are now singing their classic "Harvest for the World"
its one of those songs with a highly infectious groove and a solid rhythm, gotta love motown.. gotta love motown. Anyway the song to me is really about looking past yourself and thinking about other people for a change. it's easy to look at yourself and compare yourself with other people that you think are better or have got it better than you. but its human nature to complain, or so sayeth the taxi driver who took me from sim lim to my home. yeah human beings like to complain. we're never content.

i'd like to think that i'm pretty much a content person. but am definitely still a work in progress. there's parts of me i really dont like, and apathy and lethargy so far have got me believing that those parts dont exist. there's other parts of me which arent complete, kinda like having one half of a pair of chopsticks. you can eat with one chopstick, but wouldnt it be easier if you had a pair? there's parts of me that i like too, and hope that those parts are apparent to the people who know me.

billy joel's "just the way you are" is playing know.

I said I love you and that's forever,
And this I promise from the heart.
I could not love you any better,
I love you just the way you are.

being content is also about loving yourself enough to care about others.

and i dont make much sense when im sleepy