Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Snails are faster than ADSL

Yeah, so the veritable Giant African Snail is in fact faster than ADSL.

Which leads to the question, what other modes of organic data transfer can be used?

Kinda like the Keanu Reeve vehicle, Johnny Mnemonic, based on a short story by William Gibson. In the movie, Keanu's character, Johnny, carries in his brain, a memory chip with oodles upon oodles of data. (Incidentally, William Gibson coined the term "Cyberspace")

Why am I writing about this? Well probably b'cos I'm intrigued by the fact that the human mind has the capacity to go beyond convention and sometimes achieve great things. Albeit that sometimes we stumble on to the next BIG thing by sheer coincidence (i.e right place, right time)

So what drives some humans to push the envelope? Is it something in their genetic makeup that makes them more prone to dabbling? more prone to fiddling? more prone to brilliant flashes of mind boggling incredulity? What makes this small handfull of people different from the mass throngs of "if-it-ain't-broke-don't-fix-it" subscribers?

Any thoughts? You do? Good. Now go make a flea distribute MP3s.

Side note-

George Pan Cosmastos, director of such films as Rambo: First Blood Part 2 (the one with the singaporean actress in it, can't remeber her name tho') , and Tombstone is dead.

Click here for a moving email from one of his Conspirator/Friend/Fan

Reading Now: The Swiss Family Robinson
Ma, Paw, and the boys on a desert island. Survivor? hehe.

Watching Now: old downloaded episodes of Black Adder Goes Forth
this is a darling of a show. i need to find myself a cod piece when i watch the first season again!

Listening to: Smoma
Italian trio, SMOOOOOOOTH Jazz, FUNKY rhythms, COOL interpretations, SNAZZY compositions. GO LISTEN.

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Me and you, and a dog named Spanky

You're not the easiest person I ever got to know
And it's hard for us both to let our feelings show
Some would say I should let you go your way
You'll only make me cry
If there's one guy, just one guy
Who'd lay down his life for you and die
It's hard to say it
It's hard to say it, but it's probably me

When the world's gone crazy and it makes no sense
There's only one voice that comes to your defence
The jury's out and your eyes search the room
And one friendly face is all you need to see
If there's one guy, just one guy
Who'd lay down his life for you and die
It's hard to say it
I hate to say it, but it's probably me
I hate to say it
I hate to say it, but it's probably me

gotta believe..gotta believe

Saturday, April 16, 2005

The not so Simple Life

enough of the two whinny, spoilt, "insert-slur-here", brats.

this can only mean good things :D

okay, more random lameness.
I'm sure some of you have seen or at least heard of the latest proliferation of SMS spam.

"The vatican have elected a new Pope, and he is of asian ethnicity, as such he will be known as "Popiah".."

the follow up to which is...

"as the newly elected Popiah is unable to fulfill his duties in the papacy, the next leader of the papacy will be of indian ethnicity and wishes to be known as "Popadum".."

Friday, April 15, 2005

We ain't in Kansas anymore

5 14 15 22 25 29 40

no go!

What I'm Reading:
The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold
The story is written from the viewpoint of a murdered 14 year old girl, Susie, who also serves as the narrator of the novel. She witnesses how her family and friends cope with their grief and loss. The book serves as a pleasant reminder that the people we've lost aren't really gone, they're still watching over us. GO READ!

What I'm Listening to:
I Shot the Sheriff by Eric Clapton
Eric Clapton + Bob Marley = Funky

What I'm Watching:
24: Season 2
Jack Bauer and gang have returned. And, yes, he's having a bad day, a very bad day.
Kim Bauer a.k.a Elisha Cuthbert is still in the show! woof!

Thursday, April 14, 2005


Pop + Punk = Ponk

What exactly are kids listening to nowadays?

While on the way to work, I happened to overhear a conversation between 2 middle aged parents lamenting over the choice of music their teenaged children were listening to. One was commenting that her daughter would only listen to noisy things like Avril Lavigne and Simple Plan. whilst the other was nodding in empathy. Her own son listens to things like "System Down" which I took as her reference to "System of A Down".

note: I give them kudos for even knowing wat their kids are listening to.

With the deluge of a myriad of bands claiming to be punk acts like Good Charlotte, Simple Plan, the youth of today are being fooled into believing that any of these bands allude to real punk music. A majority of these bands, their 4 chord Ponk ballads and their "wannabebadboy" personas, have recently seen much activity on the music charts. They've even managed to displace pseudo R&B acts, but thats another story.

John Lydon, AKA Johnny Rotten was interviewed recently about music and the "new punk bands".

The interviewer asked Lydon, “What is your definition of ‘punk’?” Lydon responded, “Individual. Do-it-yourself. Independent. Free from corporate. (pause) I think that that definitely sums me up.”

The interviewer then asked, “Are there any bands now who...” Lydon obviously knew what was coming and responded, “Anyone who's parading under a hundred-thousand-dollar-plus video is not free from corporate. That's just the MTV advertising agency. I find them all to be just a bit of a sham. I mean I don't mind, I don't care, that's for some people who are into that. But don't be telling me what my life is. Because in the likes of Kelly Osbourne and this silly Lavigne
thing, yapping on about what punk is or isn't—it's just unbearable. At their age, if they're calling me old, then I want to know why they haven't done nothing of their own. Nothing. It's all borrowed from my life. Therefore, they have no word of any value in it.”

“You'll find that empty vessels make the most sound,” Lydon said following a half asked follow up question. ”And the ones that proclaim themselves the most punk are the least.”

He went on to speak about the Sex Pistols desire to play Iraq, “It's a simple enough idea. It's for the people of Iraq. I know what being disenfranchised means, I come from that and still am. Here we are, the Sex Pistols, we have no record company backing, we have no sponsorship deal. We're kind of on our own—as it always has been—and these poor bastards have got it tenfold. Nobody's doing anything for them. They're still arguing over water.”

Lydon explained that if the Sex Pistols did play Iraq it would be a benefit show and not a publicity stunt. He also took the opportunity to take a swipe at the Vans Warped Tour. “If we're in this for the money, I'd like you to tell me why we're going out at such a low ticket price, [compared to] your Warped Tours [with] your so-called fake punks, which of course we're never invited on.”

When asked about the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame, Lydon said, “That's one of the very few places in this life I wouldn't break into because there's nothing worth nicking. They put up these exhibitions of the Pistols there. It's all fake! It's all rubbish!”

But he saved most of his venom for Kelly Osbourne when the topic rounded back to the
reality TV star/wanna be popstar. “You need to see the rich kids, how they get it wrong: Kelly Osbourne, Kelly Osbourne, Kelly Osbourne. (laughing) Poor girl! Her big rebel statement is ‘I'm a punk!’ (loud laughter) Well sorry missus, but you're not. You're fat, that's all. (laughing) You're a fatty. She's a tub o' lard. (laughing) Cheers.”

Johnny does have a point. But so do the masses of kids who spend their parents hard earned money on over-hyped concerts. Ironic how that these parents probably grew up during the hey day of Punk. They probably went threw puberty to the likes of The Clash, Sex Pistols, and The Ramones. Now a hair weave and some 20-odd years later, the parents have unknowingly fed the MAN. As Dewey Finn said, rock and roll was about Sticking it to the MAN.

Punk was the expression of teenage rebellion, of breaking beyond boundaries, exploring life, living life, getting hurt and healing.

So where does that leave bands like Green Day? Are they Popular music? If the last Grammy Awards are any indication, they most definately are. Are they Punk music? I'd like to think so, they've slogged through the last few years and have garnered their fair share of criticism and critical acclaim.

Cred, yeah Punk Credentials. It isn't about how many piercings you have, or how many pre-pubescent fans (and their parents) cue up to get front row seats in the mosh-pit. If you want to know what those credentials entail, and what your entitled to, go STICK it to the MAN

So what's it all about Alfie?

lets get this straight...

1) your kids will listen to music you hate
2) your kids will not listen to the "real" music you grew up with
3) no i will not turn the volume down.

Pop + Punk = Ponk

If you disagree with me, sod off and go listen to your collectors edition LP of Flock of Seagulls.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

boogers from hell

Read this First

okay. now that i have your attention.

How does anyone go around with a leech in his/her nose and not know about it?

hello? it was a five centimetre long leech! The doctor only noticed it on the patients second trip to see him! i'd forgive the doctor for missing it if he had one working eye, and if it was a myopic, cataract inflicted one.

i guess this does shed some light on why people incessantly have to pick their noses.
exhibit a) riding the train in the mornings on the way to work: if you take the effort to not doze off the moment you grab a seat, please note the uncle in the corner with the pinky with the long finger nail. its just a matter of time

exhibit b) traffic light junction: Just because you are in your car doesnt mean that the rest of the world can't see what your doing. The traffic police should institute a fine for those who pick their noses while driving.

then of course we could also have an olympic event called Marathon Picking, or the Sprint Picking.

now for your reading pleasure:
habitual nose pickers, real life tales

Saturday, April 09, 2005

X list

(X) snuck out of the house
(X) gotten lost in your city
(X) seen a shooting star
(X) had a serious surgery
(X) gone out in public in your pajamas
( ) kissed a stranger
(X) hugged astranger
(X) been in a fist fight
(X) Had alcohol
(X) laughed and had milk, coke or water etc come out of your nose
(X) pushed all the buttons on an elevator
(X) been in love
(X) been close to love
(X) been to a casino
( ) been skydiving
(X) broken a bone (finger bone counts?)
( ) skinny-dipped
(X) skipped school
( ) flashed someone
( ) saw a therapist
(X) played spin the bottle
(X) gotten stitches
(X) drank a whole gallon of water in one hour
(X) bitten someone
(X) been to Disneyland
(X) gotten the chicken pox
( ) kissed a member of the same sex
(X) crashed into a friend's car
( ) been to Japan
(X) ridden in a taxi
(X) had feelings for someone who didnt have them back.
( ) stolen something from your job
(X) gone on a blind date
(X) lied to a friend
(X) had a crush on a teacher
( ) celebrated mardi-gras
(X) been to Europe
( ) slept with a co-worker
( ) been married
( ) gotten divorced
( ) had children
(X) seen someone die
( ) had a close friend die
( ) been to Africa
( ) Driven over 400 miles in one day
(X) Been to Canada
(X) Been to Mexico
(X) Been on a plane
( ) Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show
(X) Thrown up in a bar
( ) Purposely set a part of myself on fire
(X) Eaten Sushi
( ) Been snowboarding
(X) Met someone in person from the internet
( ) lost a child
(X) gone to college / poly
(X) graduated college / poly
( ) done hard drugs
( ) tried killing yourself
(X) fired a gun
( ) purposely hurt yourself
(X) taken painkillers
(X) miss someone right now

i'm x-tremely x-istential and x-static over all the xs

Monday, April 04, 2005

The Pope and Dave Matthews

John Paul II is no longer with us.

But the legacy of his life, his work and his love remains as evidence of there being a Greater Power. 26 years as the head of the Catholic church, and many more as a man of the cloth. It's exceedingly humbling to acknowledge that such a man could exist in this day and age.

His work changed lives, it broke down communism, it brought warring nations to the peace table, it told us that money doesnt make the world go round. How is it that one man could impact the lives of so many? A mighty man indeed.

How is it that we, even with our human propensity for destruction, violence and anger, can put aside these "differences" to venerate one man? and in the blink of an eye, once the man is forgotten, return to our back-stabbing, murderous ways?

History will remeber John Paul II. Historians will mark his birthday and departure on calendars. Theologians will argue over his reforms. Catholics will mourn, and honour his memory. How will I remeber the Pope? probably for the next few days i will remeber him, and then... ill conveniently gloss over all of this.

pathetic carbon based lifeforms.

Dave said:
Where Are you going?
With your long face, pulling down,
Dont hide away, like an ocean,
That you can't see, but you can
Smell and the sound
The waves crash down. . .

I am no superman
I have no answers for you
I am no hero, oh, that's for sure
But I do know one thing,
Where you are is where I belong
I do know where you go is where I want to be

Where Are you going?
Where do you go?
Are you looking for answers
To questions under the stars
And if along the way
You are growing weary
You can rest with me until a brighter day
You're okay . . .

I am no Superman
I have no answers for you
I am no hero, ohhh that's for sure
But I do know one thing,
Where you are is where I belong
I do know where you go, is where I want to be

Where are you going?
Where do you go?

Where do you go?
Where are you going?
Where do you go?

I am no superman
I have no answers for you
I am no hero, oh, that's for sure
But I do know one thing,
Where you are is where I belong
I do know where you go is where I want to be

Where are you going?
Where do you go?
Tell me where are you going?
Well . . . . let's go

where am i going?

Friday, April 01, 2005

I'm still here

April 1st 2005.

yup, the bargain that has earlier been struck goes into effect today.
however, i can't rightfully say that i've worked out all the details yet, but hey, i'm working on it alright? some of the stipulated clauses of the agreement, i've relenquished and some.. yeah.. well.

had free tickets to watch "Be Cool", the sequel to "Get Shorty". witty show, much better than i expected after reading several spoiler free reviews about the show. Johnny T. and Umma T., while they couldnt exactly rekindle the on screen sizzle that made dancing to old school blues cool, in my opinion looked like 2 long lost friends who'd found each other. but anytime the black eye peas and sergio mendes get to jam a song and have Johnny and Umma do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonite, is definately worth the free tickets. Vince Vaughn, The Rock, Harvey Keitel , these guys got the best lines in the entire show! oh! and Robert Pastorelli, this guy has come a long way from renovating Murphy's house! am looking forward to having both these movies on DVD, i'm sure there are some deleted scenes and cuts that never made it to print.

it's April Fool's Day, i've always wondered what the history behind today was so :
go check your calendar

Am listening to : Switchfoot - Economy of Mercy

Am reading : George Orwell - Down and Out in Paris and London

Am watching : 24 season 1 ... Elisha Cuthbert.. woof!